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I Peed During Sex. What Should I Do?


Having bladder control problem is a hush-hush among women.

It's a secret kept from their partners and even their doctors. But there isn't a need to endure this your own.

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Karen Lawson, a mother of 2 adorable kids (1 and 3 years old respectively), began experiencing urinary incontinence. Urinary incontinence is an involuntary loss of urine.

During one sexy night she had with her husband, she accidentally passed out urine. Their hot night ended promptly afterward and Karen felt so embarrassed and frustrated.

From that day on, she would always worry that she'll leak. This affected her significantly and she couldn't stop thinking about it. She wounded up discouraged and afraid, especially about sex.

Blockquote I definitely refrained from having sex. I couldn't control my bladder and didn't feel sexy at all... This was a huge obstacle that I couldn't overcome. I would never be on the top. There was a chance that I would leak on my husband again and that made me abstain sober sex ever. There were times where I had a couple of drinks and then sex. Because I was less self-conscious and if I did leak, I could blame that I was too drunk.
- Karen, 38

Karen said that she never had a spouting experience before, but the fear of leaking breaks her out in cold sweat.

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Blockquote My doctor tells me to go to the toilet before and after sex to prevent Urinary Tract Infection. But I'll think of myself leaking again, and I'll have to go one more time. Leading up to orgasm may seem like the need to go pee. This repressed me so much because I knew that I had problems controlling my urine.

- Karen

Karen isn't alone. More than 40% of women worldwide are also suffering from urinary incontinence. But this isn't something that women have to live with. Besides Karen, Stacey is also coming forward to share her story to encourage and empower other women to take their lives, and sexual confidence back.

Women Suffering from Coital Incontinence

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Coital incontinence or bladder leakage during sex occurs in 10-35% of women. And yet, only approximately 3% of women discuss their symptoms with their doctors. This ends up with more than half the cases undiagnosed and therefore, untreated.

Blockquote Many women fail to talk to their doctors because of embarrassment or the false belief that they are alone in the situation. Or that incontinence is a natural part of aging. 

-  Daniel S. Elliott, MD, professor of urology and board-certified in female pelvic medicine and reconstructive surgery at the Mayo Clinic in Rochester, Minnesota.

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Coital Incontinence can occur due to these 2 reasons. It occurs during penetration due to stress urinary incontinence. Many women leak when they engage in physical activities such as laughing, sneezing or coughing.

The second reason is probably less common. Leakage occurs during orgasm due to the involuntary bladder spasm. This is categorized as having an overactive bladder, where women feel the need to urinate urgently and frequently.

Embarrassment Prevents Women From Voicing Out

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Urinary incontinence is mainly caused by these factors: childbirth, obesity, and smoking.

Women may have experienced tissue damage during childbirth, hence weakening the pelvic floor muscles. Being overweight can put extra pressure on the bladder, causing an overactive bladder. While smoking induces coughing, which may aggravate stress incontinence.

Because of being embarrassed, most women suffer all these on their own. It does not just affect their daily lives, but also severely hindered their sexual life and emotional well-being. A 2017 study done by PubMed Central indicated that women with urinary incontinence were more likely to abstain from sexual activity and showed less sexual desire and satisfaction.

Sex is a big part of a woman's married life. Every woman should feel comfortable with it, and not embarrassed. One of the reasons that women don't voice out about urinary incontinence is because of its relation to mental health.

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There are exceptionally few scientific studies and they are usually conducted in small sampling sizes. This makes it harder to get a comprehensive understanding of the effect of urinary incontinence in women. However, a 2015 study was conducted on nearly 2000 women (aged above 65). The results showed that women with urinary incontinence were 2 times more stressed and 1.5 times more depressed than women without incontinence.

What Are The Treatments Available To Overcome Coital Incontinence?

Specific treatments are available for stress and urge incontinence. It is important to go for a physical examination to eliminate UTI or other chronic conditions as the cause for your incontinence. Behavioral therapies will then be introduced to you, such as Bladder Training and losing weight. These will help to prevent urge incontinence.

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Your doctor may also recommend you medications or surgeries like implanting a mesh sling. However, surgery should be the last option to seek.

Exploring Alternative Treatments

28-year-old Stacey has been suffering from urinary incontinence for 2 years. 

Blockquote Sex was unsatisfying and often embarrassing... All I could think about was whether I was going to pee rather than enjoying sex with my partner. After sex, I was visiting the bathroom every hour, it was a scarring experience. 

- Stacey

The symptoms got so bad that Stacey finally confided in her doctor. Her doctor recommended her to try Pelvic Floor Exercises. Her doctor explained that exercise would include doing some Yoga and strengthening her pelvic floor muscles. Strengthening the pelvic floor muscles is very important as our bladder rests right on the pelvic floor.

Stacey continued to train her pelvic floor muscles at home, and by using ComfyGears Kegel Queen. She would spend 15 minutes every day, working on her lower abdominal muscle group and learning to tighten her pelvic floor muscles through Kegel Queen. Slowly, she began to see a significant improvement after 2 months.

Blockquote As a Yoga Instructor, I believed in training my pelvic floor muscles through exercises and by using natural remedy. My sex life is better now and I am very thankful for my doctor's advice.

- Stacey

Not only did Stacey alleviate her need to urinate frequently after sex, but she has also regained her confidence and happiness. 

Overcoming All Odds

Coital Incontinence is almost like a deep, dark secret swept under the carpet. Even though millions of women suffer from it, it is rarely being addressed publicly.

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Karen and Stacey have taken a big step of courage to come forward to share their personal stories. They hope that their stories would be a source of encouragement for all ladies around the world to reach out for help. One of the ladies, Jean Anderson, has also revitalized her sex life through Kegel Queen.

Incontinence is not something to suffer in silence. There are treatments and home remedies available for your physical needs. With a better understanding of what you can do, you'll be able to overcome all odds and get back your happiness. Say goodbye to embarrassing situations! 🥰